I’m Not Right For Every Job (And Every Job Is Not Right For Me)

             Walking away from a bad fit is not failing

The nutshell version is: 

I just quit 2 jobs in 5 months. The longer version is more educational.

Once installed in my new role, it became (very rapidly) clear that I was simply not a good fit. The work I was creating wasn't working my employer liked, and the job centered around her approval. I wasn’t filling the needs of the company. But after some time, I realized I didn’t like the kind of environment where no matter how hard I tried, I wasn’t right. The company wasn’t meeting my needs, either. And that was a far scarier thought. 

Finally, in late April, I quit my 1st job. I wasn’t happy, I wasn’t growing, and I didn’t see a huge need for my role there anymore. It was time. 

I don’t know who it was harder to tell, my boss or my mother. I didn’t want to admit failure to either one. I didn’t want to admit that I’d made a bad decision. But I wasn’t telling them I failed, or that I’d gotten it wrong. I was telling them that something I genuinely thought was going to work out just wasn’t doing that, and maybe that’s allowed every now and then.

I took a break of 3 months from interviews in order to regain my mental health and forgetting the toxic work culture. Those 3 months was the period of healing, I spent quality time with my family members and it helped me a lot in gaining my confidence.

Again appeared for interview sessions in order to get a well-paid job but unfortunately what I got was

                  " Great salary package comes to the cold calling - sales job"

However, after 2 days of thinking, in spite of being a sales job, I decided to accept the offer letter but I quit this job in just one day! 

While I was waiting with the new joiners in the conference for more than 8 hours, I got a strong feeling that I don't belong here and this is not my cup of tea, that moment made me realize I am not fucking made for a sales job and i accepted it wholeheartedly and walked out of that conference room forever. I was jobless again, but this time I was happy because I got to know what I can't do whatever happens. 

                                                I want to tell, one more thing: 

"I don’t have to be right for every job, and every job is not going to be right for me. I don’t have to force myself to fit. I am not trapped or imprisoned in the wrong situation just because it is a decision I made. I can walk away from what isn’t working. There has never been a more novel idea in my head. I’m still breaking it in."

 I don’t have to be the right person for every job. Trying to be has been extremely difficult, and at times really miserable. Sometimes I decide to take a job that isn’t where I should be. I hate that, but that doesn’t make it any less true.

Currently, I do a job that is not a sales job, I changed the track and wanted to see if it works!

But fortunately or unfortunately this is one is also not working for me. Quitting a job before you have a new one is a bad decision, but I’m making it anyway, to make room for something good. 

What’s next isn’t clear to me, for the first time ever. I am not sure what job, what role, even what city comes next. But I do know that right now I’m giving myself a chance to find it, rather than forcing myself to find it. I am allowing myself to breathe, think, and stand a little bit still. It is uncomfortable and exciting at the same time.

I don’t know where I should go next, but I do know where I shouldn’t be now, and that’s the first time a bad decision has been the one that works for me.